My mind's not working. I'm going to blow up anytime!

Just people's natural instinct to jump into conclusion, yes?

I was in the wrong, no?

He's not even the third party! I love himt that's why I chose him! Ya we were close when I was with Elston and people didnt know we were already having problems then they chose to jump into conclusion that Vic was the third party! Why didnt they want to ask me what had happened exactly since they wish to know so badly? Why did they just jump into conclusions and bought over by the negative! Ya now it's not just the racial issue existence but also the third party intrusion. Why did they always see us as an incompatible pair just becuz we are different in our skin? Why is it thAt they resist us so much that they always taunt me on that? Ya my boyfriend is an Indian and so what? Im happy with him and i live my own life; i know what happiness is and i know who is the right one; and so why cant u people just accept it! Ya its alienated for whatever you say but I love him and i know he is the one who can constantly give me the attention i want! I dont play anymore unlike the past and what makes the change in me is him! Isnt that a substantial prove enough to say that i truely love him deeply and much enough?! I hate it I just fucking hate it when my friends cant accept this even when we are tgt for almost close to a year! It's already over between Elston and I and he's found himself a preety girlfriend! We both moved on and why did people still stay behind in our past? I had enough really. The world is ugly! And im naive to think that i can change ppl's' mindset over this! Fuck it they can never change their mindset so what for should i just work so hard to make them be acquainted to each other? It doesnt make much sense! Everything doesnt make sense! I tried to make them feel not so awkward when they introduce their boyfriend for the very first time; i tolerated some nonsense because i know how it feels like to be sandwiched but it doesnt pay to be kind cuz ppl just wouldnt treat u the same!

Fuck! Ya and i dont sound like im blogging in a rational state of mind cuz im through with thinking about all this unhappy stuff, really!