I'm sick of life, seriously. There're so many phases in life that I feel so lost, depressed and dejected. Sigh. Money is seriously a big issue to my life. It contributes very much to the state of loss I'm suffering now. Never did I get this dejected before. Does it happen to all adults? I hate it. I hate to be penniless; a pauper. I cant stand myself not being able to complete the things I had in mind.

Degree. Degree programme. Money. Ya, I'm penniless, so are my parents. I don't want to count on them anyway. Who's able to allow me to go on credits with them? Who? The bank? Tsk. Fuck. Life sucks. LIFE SUCKS! I want to kill myself.

Why the fuck did I reject all the full-time jobs that called on me?! FUCK. I could have gotten myself a 1.8k as customer service officer, a 1.6k for working under the government, or a 1.7k as a lab technician. FUCK. And I wont be so bothered by the money issue if I were to accept those jobs! Why did I reject the lab technician job today man! This could be the only chance to save myself. FUCK. Why didnt I think before I speak?! Fuck. FUCK LIFE! FUCK LIFE!!

SIGH. ok, no. I must hang on.
I wont stop studying. I'll have my ways. Wont give up this minute.