Well, recently I saw one of my exs on the street with his girlfriend and I supposed they intended to avoid me, or perhaps they didnt want to pause their footsteps near the vicinity I was standing, which was at the platform of the traffic lights, so they chose the other path instead of taking their usual route.

Sometimes I wished I had the courage to ask him how he has been doing in his life. Is he still schooling or has he graduated? If he has, is he proceeding to polytechnic? These questions remained as questions that would never be answered.

Saving some of the past conversations I had with all my exs is indeed the right thing to do because they serve as a perfect memory for me to recollect, be it happiness or hurt. Of course, I'm no longer concern about the emotional drive I had in the past, but at least certain things which faded with time are back now. To me, these conversations sounded interesting after 2 years had past from the time of incident.

Actually, there're two person I am very guilty of, even till this point of time, because I believed that the naive and stubborn-minded me inflict them with psychological turmoil at that juncture where I declared a break-up. One of these people is Jianye, while the other is B.

I recalled very vividly how much hurt there was when trying to put an end to the relationship. As the reading and comprehension for the conversation I had with Jianye proceeds, I saw the immense hurt he had at that point of time. I forgot how this relationship failed, but with that conversation, I saw how I gave a heartwrenching injection to him. Through exchanging messages via MSN, we quarreled over another party, and because I was being too defensive about that person, things got out of hand. Enough was enough. 'End it' was the phrase that came into my mind. However, there was one thing I was sure of, and that was I didnt want him to give the other party a punch on the face because of me as the reason. His behaviour pissed me off, and perhaps he was still a juvenile, I believed he would have reckoned he was immature enough to look back at this now.

After the relationship, he tried to reconcile, patch things up and tried to be friends with me. But because of the awkward situation that I was caught at that point of time, I rejected this bridge for the synthesis of this friendship piece by piece. I was foolish, I presumed.

All I wanted to say is, I'm sorry, JianYe. I regret as I looked back at the relationship. Not that I regret for not holding onto this, but i regret for bottling everything up and throwing everything back at you that very night. This might be insignificant to you now, but to me, it still meant something. Not love, but apologies.